Amish write too much poetry!

From Blackboard Bulletin, Feb. 2007

<>Life is shaded Through and through
Mostly by man’s point of view.
Count your troubles—you’ll be sad.
Count your blessings—you’ll be glad.

From Plain Interests March 2007

<>

The editor tries to discourage contributing poets: Most people can express themselves in prose better than poetry. Poems take up more space than prose, and poems take more time to write than prose. However in an effort to use poetry, Plain Interests is trying a new technique: they are printing poems in prose form. If you read it correctly, you’ll catch the rhythm and rhyme.

From the column “Jottings”, written by an Amish neighbor of mine (in this rural area, you include as neighbors people up to 10 miles away)

“Who first said: ‘Of the people, by the people, for the people.’ The first 99 persons out of 100 will reply, ‘Lincoln’, and the 100^th will add ‘in his Gettysburg Address.’ But this famous phrase actually in 615 years old and appeared in John Wycliffe’s introduction to his translation of the Bible, published in England in 1382.

I get Melvin Graber in Trouble

While visiting the local Bishop, we talked about how Amish accept and reject modern technology.

According to Bishop Miller, “Each community makes its own decisions on what to accept and reject. To the outsider the choices seem arbitrary. One of the first new inventions we adopted was the chainsaw. I’m not sure why, but we use them for logging, cutting firewood and cutting blocks of ice for the ice houses.”

Electricity is not allowed, but gas and diesel engines are. One local cabinetmaker bolted the front end of a car to the side of his shop and powered his tools with a shaft running from the engine across the length of the building and attached to each tool.

Not all electricity is bad. Flashlights replaced lanterns for getting around in the dark, but inside lighting is still gas lamps. Buggies have battery powered lamps for safety.

One winter night, the milk inspector stood outside the milk house with Bishop Miller. They were having problems state regulations and cooling the milk fast enough. The Amish put milk cans in a large vat flowing with cold spring water. It wasn’t very convenient and it was hard to cool the milk fast enough.

The inspector complained, “I don’t see why you don’t bring in electricity just to run an electric pump so you can cool the milk faster.

The bishop replied, “The problem is once you have electricity in the barn, you’ll be wanting to run some lights, then some more tools. Pretty soon you’ll have a radio and television.”

Hearing aids and glasses are okay. Increasing numbers of communities allow sneakers and modern shoes.

“Now there’s something we’ve talked about.” Bishop Miller pointed to the wall clock. “That clock you can buy for about $125. A plain battery clock costs $10. Some folks think we should allow battery clocks. We’ve talked about it, but, well, we’ve done nothing about it yet.”

“I remember seeing Melvin Graber pull a solar calculator out of his pocket. Must be solar power is ok.”

“What?” Bishop Miller suddenly looked tense. “Those aren’t allowed.”

Oops. “Well…” I tried to back track. “That was nearly twenty years ago. I’m sure Melvin got rid of that a long time ago.”

I hope the Bishop let that pass. I never dared ask Melvin if he got into trouble.